Relations That Lead Nowhere
The statistics says that the most stable couples are formed by people who had known each other for a year or two before they got married. It seems easy to understand what the reason for break-off is, if the partners had not known each other for a long time before the marriage. They just did not have a chance to learn each other well and created an illusionary image of their partner according to some sketchy impressions. Close contacts easily ruin suchlike images.
But what is the reason for the fact that two people who had known each other for many years before they got married fail to form a successful couple? It seems, the longer you know your partner the fairer is your perception of him or her and your decision then is supposed to be more considered, while your chances for break-off are consequently smaller. However, events prove it is not so. The relations that got stuck at a particular stage can hardly lead to happy marriage. Probably, one day they reach a certain limit at which no one of the partners wants to develop them.
If you and your partner are living in the same country, both of you have equal opportunities for break up, for ceasing or developing your relations. The situation when a foreigner dates a Russian girl in the Internet does not provide equal opportunities for that. Despite the Western men, who can afford visiting Russia twice a year, the majority of Russian girls do not have enough money to visit their groom in his place. Moreover, it is much easier to get Russian visa then one of some other country, e.g. the United States one. That is why a Russian girl has nothing to do than depending on the man’s decisions and actions.
Let’s imagine this notorious situation from the point of view of a Russian girl. She dates a man in the Internet. As their relationships develop, the letters become more and more emotional and sincere. Finally, he comes to Russia to see her after a year of correspondence. They spend several romantic days or even nights together. She thinks that everything is going to be fine and expects to get married soon. However, having returned home, her expected husband takes his seat in front of the computer to keep on the correspondence at least for another year.
What is she to expect and to do in such a situation? She loses herself in conjectures. Is it she who somehow dissatisfied his wants or it is just because he does not want to make family at all? Should she reckon upon him or it is better to start her search for a husband once again?
A woman who was good enough to attract you may be as well appreciated by some other man. She knows that full well and also has a right to choose. She may continue waiting for your decision for a couple of months, but then she will start to look for another ways of settling down her own family life. Thus, if you really want to be with her, you should not linger with your relationships. Being a woman, she expects you to act like a man. But if your meeting has shown that she is not the one you would like to bind your life with, you should screw up your courage and honestly tell her about this. Let her go! Do not make her spend time waiting for you in vain!
Questions and answers of our psychologist
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