Whimsical Russian Brides
Trying to date a Russian girl, a lot of Western men have faced several typical situations. At the first gaze, these situations have nothing in common, although I strongly believe that the reason for them is the same.
A man meets a girl in the Internet and they engage in animated correspondence. Their relations gain up the pace and it seems that the marriage is coming soon. However, the amount of letters from the girl’s side suddenly decreases while the messages become shorter and drier. Moreover, one can get the impression that the man’s ardent letters will never get read at all. Indeed, the things the girl writes back strongly recall formal run-arounds.
Finally, they decide to meet each other “off-line”. At first the girl pretends to be shy and self-giving and demonstrates sincerity of feelings and total absence of financial interest. However, before long her material claims begin to grow with such a speed that even a well-off man feels himself at sea. The thing that perplexes most is not the claims as such but the very progress they get.
A man meets a girl at the dating site and comes to see her. Their relations seem absolutely idyllic. He generously grants her with both his consideration and money. The girl is also supposed to do her best to please him. They part for a little while, leaving the man in a sweet anticipation of the next meeting with the brightest prospects ahead. But suddenly the girl grows cold towards him. It’s likely she no more needs him and even his money. The man is bewildered. He cannot understand what he did wrong and how he insulted her.
These three situations that supposedly hardly have anything in common are determined by the same and only reason, which is increased self-esteem of the girls. Marriage is not quite the thing now in Russia; therefore successful men avoid serious relations. This is the main stimulus for Russian girls to seek for a husband abroad, which is not at all because of their rush for a happier life, as one may think.
Fruitless attempts to build the relationships with Russian men make a girl feel inferior and non- demanded. And out of blue there comes an attractive man who is willing to love her and spend money on her and even wants to marry her. Her self-esteem grows rapidly followed by her claims, which are not material only. She begins to think that she deserves something better than she already has. She abandons her benefactor keeping him in mind as a backup and goes on the prowl for her prince charming.
Let us be less judgmental towards the girls like that, as long as many men conduct in the same manner. If you do not want to become a bench-warmer, you’d better not to give your lady any reasons for considering you totally conquered with your heart belonging to her. There is no need, in fact, to tell her that she is not more than just a candidate among the others, but you either should not be too early in giving her the hope that you will certainly marry her.
Questions and answers of our psychologist
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